personal, family then social!

the 2 year innocent child's eye is no longer innocent
he's been cursed by the incident
when his ma painted in red with her won inner color
sleeping quietly on the chaos road
when the nervous system breaks down
by the bullet in her head
he sense his near-to-sibling
the 7 month fetus in the dead mother's womb
asking him to save
but all he can do was to watch it dying
slowly like a sunset.
all he does was to cry and cry
felt his bone sweating

that night, in his dream
he grew up with a strong arm
walking on the road where he lost his ma and unnamed-sibling
holding the same gun as they had
indulging the same killing like they did
producing the same person like he is
coz he thinks, this is life
coz they makes him think, this is life

it was a harebrained incident
a personal loss, gravely peril
a family, becoming unfortunate
no one is to blame
a society, who takes all the blame
and degrading and degrading...

euthanasia

your firm hand and fierce eye
and i see the black hole where the gun barks
on my dusty-sweat-coated forehead
this tear-stained eye
longs for yet another moment with you
in this hell

your hygienic hand and your motherly look
with that tranquilizer on that syringe
on my veins, to relax me down
this exhausted soul
wants to cuddle you for the warmth
in this heaven

right or wrong
for good or for bad
you are the one who kills
suffering is my other name
that you have made me
then again you pity my miserable life
and you mercy kill me
amongst you even fought who to mercy kill me

with your gun’s little hole
you advice the trigger
and you become my birth-master
your gun is all-in-one tool for you
you use it everywhere
even to gain a grain of rice
your gun is your strongest drug
makes you forget everything
even the consciousness of being alive

well, enough of euphemism
i said euthanasia means ‘shoot yourself’.

matam amagi waari oibikhiba?

kadaidagibu khangurino
up-to-date phijol hekta setlak-e
chahi khudinggi fashionsu adum hongi
jeans khonggrowdi lairadana gariphao hongi


kok leiba tunggi yumbirenni
mee khai!-bana heiriba leibak machasingni
kuina chat-chattaba nungshinahoudaba yaade
haying lei-leitaba ngasi thakhoudaba yaade


ojasu mangai, tuitionda takpiraktro mahai
shatrasu mahelli tuitiongi nama, ayukta gulli thihoudaba yaade
assembly loiraga canteenda changang amaga pokhai
jagat pumbagi waathi makhanaodagi thoklak-e


mayumdi enak khunbanina ngari amaga chara walli
yamna phajabagi typeta phadrak-phadrak thoklak-e, keithel sannaosingga amuk pulli
leikai ahansing mamit nanare dhaab-singdu oobada
hotnaba lepte leipung phamba, palem mama leirabisingna laaten amaga toklaktriphao


meegira mashagira harao kumheida mathwai thajei
rock-cum-fashion sow kaina touni ya-ya laowi
‘welcom to daa hoten caliphonia” rehearsal towwi
nungsha yungkhatlakpaduda mapuna besaimachasa laorak-e, kai chelli


wakhaldi nongshani, thee! toukhai, thutti laode
chak thee! chanei, thibong nattana ateidi leite
thumikak nung hattok-uro kapthok-uro hainei, kari lonno khangde
toubadadi matu thirakanda thirapna pan dukan amadi inthorak-e, thagatningaini.

chess board

the opening game:

it’s a game, game of death
starts with a victim like a pawn in chess
builds up strategy by the supporting bishops and knights
like a person tries to voice out for a solution with wrath within
so the opponent castles the king
like the chief minister hides somewhere in the capital
it’s the board, the battle ground, emagi tampak, manipur
where the game is often played
where the opponent’s pieces has acquired a unique rule
where the game from the meecham always lose

the middle game:

rules are followed no more
galore of thinking and long term plans
every single loop holes come to the public eye
yet everybody is in saving their asses
attacks-defends and defends-attacks
and lives keep losing, big or small
the notion of sacrifices started hitting the nerves
for the overall advantage of your side
even though this is just a civil war
a fooled ethnic war

the end game:

it has started and there has to be an end
general sacrifices for a soldier
for him to take up responsibility in a more fulfilling way
this is when the king comes out from the protected
exercise his duty, alas!
the circumstance where you cannot miss your turn even if you wanted to
now you relearn the game yet again
now again you see nobody around the board
you win or you lose
you have unmade and remade yourself.

message to offspring

you came to this world
not because i enjoyed the sex
but because you are the vision child

you once catch the gun toy
i held your hand an alphabet toy
and you know we both felt joy

the first day i felt you at school
you cried the fear of being left alone
and you came out with the proud smile of bring in the best crowd

you are born dangerous
always like to fought your classmates, on the last day of your vacation
and suddenly you suspended it; remembering that lesson in moral science

i’m boring and poor
and you don’t like me anymore
but listen to your ma, for all your do’s & dont’s

she will teach you to be a good person
the power of pen over gun
the fame over money
the courage over corruption
the education over intoxication
the voices over silly politicians
the anger before viruses with guns in their hand
the tears before the poor meitei-emas
the bravery before killings
above all she will teach you
how a good educational system could change a generation

i’m sad you are born in this curse land
but i know your inner inside
so spread the wings for your generation saving

we are the generation who closes my eyes
just to see a god child like you
we are ashamed to ema leibak & you please give us the hope before we die.

a boy’s dream

the boy thought
i am in a cave call home
inside another cave call manipur.

knowledge is the quest of my life
will i ever get ‘em here, in this standoffishness
when’ll i be free to the space?

want to know how things work
more inspiration from “october sky”, “contact” movies
life comes once to embrace ones dream.

cycling to paddy fields
reaping the harvest you saw
and you pass yet another despairing day.

learning differential equations and quantization
but with lantern of smoke-filled wispy glass
after a meal of chengel or tan-gang

he slept dreaming of a delhite who bunks class
for a date with micro-skirt wearing girl in some shopping mall
yet who clears iit

he blames the government for the geographical disadvantages
for the immature educational system
for the lack of information and motivation to students

he indulges in college politics and was misguided
quits it and starts a home business
he knows he has been rearranged to a living-death soul.

one sunny day makes him reach to a far away no man’s land
unmade and remade himself
and had the final blow to his long gone torn dream.

who are you?

you are proud to be in general quota
whilst your brothers and sisters get big shots in the name of caste

you think you are trendy, sanskitizing and hindunising
just to end up having ethnic clashes with yourself

you ignored the fights of minor groups who were indeed protecting you
and now you don’t have any answer to those kuki’s questions

still you are damn chauvinist and you soliloquize
whatever man, i am still the one. numero uno, you know.

when you meet a new you, you don’t ask what he do
you only ask for a lunch someday, namesake
because he and you are spoil brats, who do nothing in life.

but you are real genius; you act like millionaire with only a penny in your pocket
you can punish your ma with your domestic demands for clothes and bikes
you go to capital for graduation; a five year long study

you like loosing control and you keep dying by guns
is it that you are patriot, a broken heart for his land?
or are you a businessman with a gun?

-------------------------------------------------------
additional words by ringo pebam.

so proud you are, of the shirui lilies
so you write of them, the beautiful lines

it's the hill men who protect the lilies and the hills
as you sit and talk at the leipungs about state integrity

your ego still tells you are a genius and they are fools
'cos you are from the beautiful tampak with the general-quota?

Fear is the fashion!

Fear seems to be a fashion now
When something wrong happens unaware
Your dream will let it feel
Still you are a flip-flop
Confused all the way to the root of conscience
Something must be going on
Yeah I have a fear that something wrong is really going on
But fear seems to be a fashion now.